Monday, March 06, 2006

BAD! Kitty Art Studio ~ Portland Oregon ~ Artist Blog


BAD! Kitty Art Studio &
Sybil Ann Tells All
Quote of the day
***
In the deep, unwritten wisdom of life there are many things to be learned that cannot be taught. We never know them by hearing them spoken, but we grow into them by experience and recognize them through understanding. Understanding is a great experience in itself, but it does not come through instruction.

Anthony Hope
***
My Understanding is fine.
I feel numb and kind of removed from the world this morning.
Yesterday was more than I thought I could take, and I took it, and did nothing.
I didn't do anything to stop what needed to happen.
The oldest came and collected his "belongings"
from the driveway, where Mate Man and I left them for him, that was not what we had planned for, but while explaining to the little ones why we were moving his stuff around...They made sure, first that this meant he was not coming back, really, really...Then told us some things that made us feel very angry as parents...So,
I watched from the window.
I watched him and his friend smile, laugh, check the boxes, look things over,
load it into the car, and drive away.
Well not before he came to the door with his friend to ask for more "things", like his $1500.00 electric guitar...You know the high ticket items...
I included a letter with the boxes,
and my goodbye, for now, along with an explanation's of the re-distribution of his "goods", along with the announcement of
a "no fly zone" on communication between us, for now...until I can feel more responsible for my anger, which I admit for the first time in my life... I laid my hands on that baby...on that child from my own body and knew I would never hurt him... right now I want to smack the white off of him, so the kindest act I have available to me... Right now is to just let him be.
I need some quite time between us.
I need to not know for just a little while.
I wish him well, but I am not going to stop
feeling angry and hurt and angry, well at least not right this moment...I don't know when it'll change, I'll send up a smoke signal to let you know, a high sign.
Today, me and the little ones are taking a mental
health day...I am not sure what my day holds...
I am mailing "Secrets" out today....Huge painting in and of my life....
the essence of my being...Was it's other name...And am very glad inside about that, knowing it's magic is just really beginning with this trip...To it's new home.
I have auctions closing soon, and no bids, but I know all about paying dues, so it deters me not.
My Intuitive LifeCoaching site has gotten lots of compliments, but no action...Well dues again...People just are not yet "feeling" my vibe on the doing what I love and being proud to do it with out Greed...
they will come round...
that's the change I want to see in the world...That's
me in action.
So today I pay dues, and
attention to the little wounded kids in my home,
that have been though
Hell...
and now we are all coming back.
We formed a circle last night, and each of us from biggest
to smallest expressed their anger, and hurt anyway they wanted to...
and it helped the little ones....Because as we know as parents, you can't let them see that you are really afraid...
and you have to be mindful of what you say and apologize for....Who are you really mad at for that feeling, where does that apology belong? What is the right way to be truthful, yet not give too much information that itself causes
pain? Well, I am not completely sure, but I am giving it all that I know about everything I am highly educated to do, then asking for professional help for what I am not...
sure of...And just keeping on, because that's what
machines of Love, programmed for
living really do....
they continue.
Raw and Radiant.
Heather/Sybil Ann
New Art coming later today, a new oil painting.
stay tuned.
And go bid...Or my art manager is going to have a coronary
over the fact that I refuse to listen to good, sound old fashion American business
advice.
I'm so stubborn, let's prove him wrong shall we?
Ok...Let's do....
tra-la-la-la..What's that you say? YOU CAN'T DO THAT, You can't put award winning work up for that price!!! If you do that you are CRAZY, you'll RUIN your artistic credibility!!! Oh Ok....like that's paying the bills...
I'll do it my way.....tra-la-la-la, you see... Because, it's just so simple;
it does not matter to me that they sell for cheap, Hell I GIVE ART AWAY, I know, crazy talk...Sometimes, when I am doing well enough, sometimes when I am starving... Their dollar value that they sell for does not change my inner opinion of myself, of the quality of my work...
Rejection, What about That!? HA! No! So, that's all you got...I can take that all day, eat it with a fork and spoon...I have been doing this for years, or knowing that the fact that THIS it is what it is ....This is real life man, this is what it looks like...When you are truly committed, and dedicated to the change... Then 75.00 dollars is better than 00.00 dollars...RIGHT?
The glass is half full....Baby, just look again.
So, hit the header, go buy some art, book a reading...
yes....I mean now....Hurry, hurry, quick, quick!
Support living Americans, right here in America!
Support Living Artist WORLDWIDE
Support equals empowering....
want some?
Then Give what you GET.
Chop, chop!
http://www.ebay.com >>>badkittyartstudio
or just hit the header of this post you silly billy.

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